Friday, August 12, 2005

My Friend Should Be On Jerry Springer

But first...you people are killing me with this game from yesterday. I will do the people that signed up after I went to bed, but be aware that it takes me so friggin long to do this stuff that I barely got to visit anyone yesterday and now probably won't visit anyone today. So if you signed up already your answers will be in yesterdays comments some time today. NO MORE SIGNUPS THOUGH, PLEASE! And no more games for me after this! But don't forget...if you played with me yesterday (or today), you have to post the game on your blog now. EDIT: They are all done, even those of you kind folks who said I didn't have to do yours. I did them because you were so sweet to say I didn't have to do them.-----------
So I have this friend. She is very like me in so many ways - we are the same age, we went to school together since 7th grade, our families are very similar in makeup and closeness. But somewhere along the way (and this story goes waaaaay deeper than I am going to share here), her life took so many odd turns that now we have very little in common.

This friend's nickname is Springer. As in Jerry Springer. As in, he could fill a whole season of shows with her life. Here is season one in a nutshell:

1. I am married, yet pregnant with a married Orthodox Jewish guy's baby!*
2. I woke up in bed next to my husband's brother!
3. I am divorced, yet pregnant again with the same married man's baby!
4. I slept with my children's female nanny!
5. I slept with my step-brother and my children's female nanny...at the same time!
6. The Syrian Mob (allegedly) set my house on fire while I was sleeping and I had to jump out of a second story window to survive...and I was 8 months pregnant!
7. I just had my third kid and I am not married...but the father is! Just not to me!
8. I am so jealous that my kids' nanny is getting married that I try to fistfight him!

That's all I can think of right now (not that its not enough) but I know there is more I just can't think of. What is so sad is that she is the nicest person around. I love her to death and I love hanging out with her. I went to visit her yesterday, since she just had a baby (yep, by a married guy), and we had a nice time. I asked her about the father of the baby, and she said he is totally uninvolved (since he is married) and she is fine with it. I can't help but wonder what kind of example she is setting for her 7 year old daughter.

*Just to note: the only reason I mention this guy's religion is this: he is married with 5 children. He is Orthodox, so after sundown on Fridays he cannot do anything, even something as simple as turning on a lightswitch. So one Friday, he walked 3 miles from the temple to her house and she forgot to leave the lights on for him. So he sat in the dark for 4 hours until she got home. Now, I can respect a man who takes his religion so seriously that he would sit in the dark rather than commit what he considers to be a sin. BUT HE WAS THERE WAITING FOR HIS MISTRESS. HE IS A MARRIED MAN, WITH 5 CHILDREN. HE CANNOT TURN ON A LIGHT, BUT HE CAN COMMIT ADULTERY AND GET HIS MISTRESS PREGNANT TWICE??? Talk about hypocrisy.

44 comments:

KARCHAMB said...

Ya know, every time I think there can't be anything new with Springer, there is. Never a dull moment.

Free to Be said...

OMG, pardon the pun, is this for real? Tell me you made this up. Sometimes I'm surprised how surpised I am by the crap people pull.

InterstellarLass said...

Oh lordy. Just when I thought people couldn't get any more weird...

mrsmogul said...

SOunds like my friend who got PREGNANT, while she was still married. Her lover was their friend who was 10 years younger and a colleague of her husbands!! So imagine telling your husband that!

TrueJerseyGirl said...

Yes, Free To Be, everything I posted is real. Not even embellished at all. All very true.

Finn said...

God I'm boring.

-xtessa- said...

oooh... i also had a friend who has three children with three different fathers and she's not married to any of them and one of the guys was also married...

she never talks to me anymore. hmmmm....

Raehan said...

You know, I'm actually starting to like Jerry Springer now that he's got a radio show on Air America.

Funny friend. She must be nice if he walks that far her, huh?

Patsy Darling said...

Oh I just love Springer it's some much fun to tell new people stories about her, they just stand there with their mouths hanging wide open.

Natsthename said...

Oh my GOODNESS, that married guy is a LEW-ZER, Orthodox or not!! So, it's ok to walk and have illicit sex after sundown, but dammit, leave the lights out!!!

Your friend...bless her...needs some help. Glad she has a friend like you.

Master Foley said...

that is some fucked up shit
ca-ca-crazy

Holly said...

Oh man, that is just too much! I also wonder how her kids will turn out with that kind of situation...

As long as she loves them and doesn't abuse or neglect them and can provide for them....

But still! What a crazy situation. Sad for your friend too, right? To not have a little closer to normal situation to be a Mommy in. That would make me sad. But then, maybe I presume too much. Maybe some people are just fine with it.

Anyway, she is lucky to have you as a friend still.

soapbox.SUPERSTAR said...

HA, oh that is a great story, not for your friend, but great nonetheless!

Lassa said...

OH MY GOD that is so funny! I mean, I hate to laugh about her situation, but it's funny about the married guy caring more about the lightswitch! She really DOES need to go on Jerry Springer. :P

Evey said...

This is sad and funny. Sad for your friend that she has been in this situation more than once. But funny that that moron of a man apparently sees adultry as ok but not turning the damn lights on. Thats messed up.

Oh and if your want True I will buy an extra suitcase just for you to fit into:)

Oh AND I wanted to ask you about going to hockey games in New Jersey. Should I be scared showing up in Oilers gear and or my husband in Avs gear? We are planning on going to games in as many places as we can to see our teams and NJ is one of those places.

JoiseyGirl said...

I love people like that. They make me LOVE my own life LOL

Better Safe Than Sorry said...

wow, they're both messed up! don't worry about doing mine from yesterday unless you already have, that's what i get for dropping by so late in the day.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Weird is a lot of people!

Take a look at my latest post, as I have your thoughts about me on it.

jlybn123 said...

I'm at a loss for words here...that is just way too much to compute!

Indigo said...

That is absolutely insane!!!

Superhero Bob said...

Not to belittle the seriousness of your friend's situation...but I suddenly feel a whole lot better about my own life. Who needs soap operas with lives like these?

Shannon said...

Well, isnt that nice...?

Danielle said...

Springer definitely gets a WOW... I genuinely hope that she will take control of her situations, and gain the confidence needed to realize that she is worth someone's whole attention.

And True, that was so nice of you to follow through on the game with everyone. But it shows how much you are loved, that everyone wanted to hear what you had to say! You are true blue...

Better Safe Than Sorry said...

hey, thanks so much for doing the quiz for me. i tried to copy and paste it, but it won't let me, is your page protected or something? anyway, i put it in draft, i'll post it on the weekend and leave you a note when it's done so you can see the answer to your question. have a great weekend!

Free to Be said...

BUUUURRRRPPP!!

Have a great weekend TJG!

Kait said...

Hi! Michele sent me.
Happy weekend! =)
Adjunct Kait

mg said...

*LAUGHS* OMG~ and I thought my post today had indication of high drama~!!! This friend of yours sounds right up my alley ;)

have a fabulous weekend, thanks for tuning in!

mg

Marie said...

Wow! I am not even sure what to say...that's some heavy stuff.!

Credit Repair said...

Oh lordy.. your friend wins in the soap opera department. Jerry Springer should give her a call ;)

Amazes me... truly.

Redhead Mommy said...

Two words: Chaos Addict

Brookelina said...

Brilliant. I'm dyin' over here! LOL

deputyswife said...

Slept with the step-brother and the nanny?! Holy buckets! She needs to write a book.

Oh yeah, I am thinking the married father is sitting on the couch saying "light switch, evil. mistress, good." What a jerk.

Danius Maximus said...

and yet it could all be real; the seedy underbelly of america awaits...why is almost everyone freaking pregnant? good show, BTW almost all questions answered correctly. I do in fact stare at some pics I post long after they are there. But only when no one else is looking :P

trine said...

whatabuncha freaks!!

im flying home today YOOHOO!!!

except i am hungover.... sigh..

Southern Sweetheart said...

Yowsers! Reading this makes me feel not so bad about my own life! Isn't it weird how some of the nicest people allow themselves to get into the weirdest most uncommon situations?

Anonymous said...

Right, so here is my question - why the HELL would she tell anyone this stuff? So she is pretty fucked up, I can understand that, a lot of people are fucked up. I just don't get when people are SO OK with their fucked upedness. I would never admit to those things to someone that I am kind of friends with but really not.

(the comments seem funny and there isn't anywhere to put my name)

-Toryssa
http://fancythat.squarespace.com

mcgibfried said...

please tell me that this friend is hot..
because i would hate the think that fugly folk are having this much fun!

PresentStorm said...

Wow that her life really is a Springer show in itself ..And to think all this time I thought those people were paid actors ..lol

LisaBinDaCity said...

Hope that yutz was afraid of the dark :-)

As for your friend... perhaps a few issues methinks? LOL.

Mainline Mom said...

That's effed up. People are stupid. Some people are really really stupid.

..::Meems::.. said...

3 words: What. The. Fuck?!

That's some craziness right there.

Carol (Smiles and Laughter) said...

And one of my relatives just told me they thought the people on Jerry Springer were just actors....

That thing you mentioned about the Orthodox Jew is very desturbing. HELLO!!!!!!!!

Molly said...

Wow! umm yeah *jaw still hanging open* That does sound like Springer

Misfit Hausfrau said...

Excuse me, did you say the SYRIAN Mafia??? What's THAT about?!?!