I wrote my last post in a true fit of anger at not being able to personally have it out with the idiot who felt the need to criticize my family's decisions to do what is best for us. I truly felt like it was not worth it for me to put myself out there anymore when people are so hateful and judgemental - whether they claim to be having a "bad day" or not. And not being able to have it out with the bitch - that for me was the hardest part. Because, as in your comments when you told me to "be Jersey" - well, that is what I wanted. I wanted to personally tell off the ignoramus who left the comment and make her sorry she f'ed with me. But I couldn't do that, and that made me even angrier.
Trust me, people, I am a very tough broad. Not alot truly gets to me. Almost nothing hurts me to my core because I know who I am and what I stand for. But this comment wasn't just a troll. Its like this - imagine making the toughest decision you have ever had to make, questioning yourself about it a million times, deciding what is right and necessary even though your doubts are still rolling through your head - and then having someone come in and tell you that all of your doubts are right and that you are a selfish person for making that decision. All while the feelings are so raw and close to the surface. It was just too much for me to handle yesterday. It wasn't about letting the troll win - trust me, kids, no one beats me - it was about perhaps sharing too much with people I don't know and letting them in on parts of my life that maybe I should have kept to myself. I couldn't really see a good reason to continue to blog anymore.
But then. Wow.
I wasn't really thinking of *your* responses when I wrote yesterday's post about quitting. I was just really mad and had no one to punch. I couldn't have ever predicted that so many of you would express such wonderful sentiments to me.
All I can say is thank you. Thank you for reminding me why I do this. Thank you for taking the time to ask me to stay. Thank you for making me smile and laugh at a time when that is the last thing I felt like doing. Thank you to my true blogging friends for coming out en masse to support me, and thank you to the lurkers and newcomers for de-lurking and telling me you like my blog.
I am going to stay around, and I thank you for convincing me that I should. I appreciate your comments and the many, many emails I received more than you will know. So again, thank you.